A few days back, I was talking to a friend of mine. She was in quest of a place to stay, near her office.
She: My friends and I are looking for a house around this area. Would you help us in finding one ?
Me: What are you looking for, 2BHK or 3BHK ?
She: No, I am actually looking for PGs.
Me: Rented houses would be more comfortable than PGs. Why do you go for a PG ?
She: No, parents wouldn’t feel safe putting us in independent houses.
Why does an independent woman in an independent country feel unsafe to make a living.
Whats wrong with us ?
A few excerpts from the official statements made by socially accepted individuals.
“The female is a female by virtue of a certain lack of qualities; we should regard the female nature as afflicted with a natural defectiveness.”
“When a woman has scholarly inclinations there is usually something wrong with her sexual organs.”
“Direct thought is not an attribute of femininity. In this, woman is now centuries … behind men.”
“If rape is inevitable, just relax and enjoy it.”
“The poor fellows, three of them have been sentenced to death. Should rape cases lead to hanging? Boys are boys, they make mistakes. Two or three have been given the death sentence in Mumbai. We will try and change such laws…we will also ensure punishment of those who report false cases.”
“Hindu women should have between four and ten children”
“Just because India achieved freedom at midnight does not mean that women can venture out after dark. They should ensure that they do not board buses with few passengers. The woman should have thought twice before boarding the suspicious private bus that night. Though the incident was condemn-able, she should also have behaved keeping in mind the situation. Although it [Delhi gang-rape] was a minor incident, Soniaji made it a point to meet the protesters when they called on her.”
“Pakistan’s powerful Council of Islamic Ideology (CII) has passed a draft proposal for a bill which recommends that “husbands must be allowed to lightly beat their wives” in case the later behaves erratically.”
Ain’t equality a birthright of every individual ?
What’s wrong with us ?
From the advent of civilization, we have collectively taken a hypocritical stand in one aspect, which is prejudice against a sexually dimorphic human species. Our rivers are named after women, our Vedas insist the parents to gift their daughters the intellect and the power of knowledge before she gets married, our customary practices reiterate women to light the lamps for Agni to symbolize the absence of darkness and grief, and the very same custom was cool with pushing a widowed woman into the same Agni.
The same hypocrisy still exists in our everyday life.
Those “Don’t cry like a girl.” provokes from the elders, those “ Are you a girl ? Won’t you come outside and play with us” taunts from your seniors, those ” Girls will marry and go, you should work hard to get settled” free advice from the entire world.
Those “She has a good hand writing and ability to mug up” lame excuses we tell our parents when the girl next door scores better than us.
If a Woman voices her opinion call her a “Slut” , If a woman is successful call her a “Witch“, If husband fails in his business, call his wife “Unlucky“, above all if a girl refuses to accept your proposal, “Strew acid at her” or lest “Kill not just her but also her character“.
Ain’t Gender difference a matter of chromosome ?
What’s wrong with us ?
In a society where still a girl’s dress speaks about her character, the caste flashes first in the headlines instead of the fact that a girl was raped, the concept of Consensual Sex is worth unmentioned.
Equality shouldn’t stop with drafting just a bill. It should be in the very essence of society, right from “building toilets in motels where men find open ground to pee and women are left with just two choices; One is to go in search of darker places or lest control the advances of kidney” to “treating a woman with good will not because she is a woman but an individual”.
Respect a woman not because you have a mother or a sister. Respect her for the person she portrays.
Misogyny is no less shittier than racism.